The Bible has much to say concerning the dangers of improper family relationships. “There is a generation that curseth their father, and doth not bless their mother” (Proverbs 30:11). “The son dishonoureth the father, the daughter riseth up against her mother” (Micah 7:6), “the eye . . . mocketh at his father, and despiseth to obey his mother” (Proverbs 30:17). Yet, the first commandment with promise was to “honour thy father and mother” (Ephesians 6:1-2). This honour can be demonstrated by hearkening to (Proverbs 23:22) and obeying one’s parents (Colossians 3:20). As parents seek the Lord’s direction, God will lead them as to how to lead their individual homes (Ezra 8:21). The child’s responsibility is directed toward submitting to and learning of the Lord by obeying the parents.
The Lord gave specific commandments to both the husband and the wife. The Lord, knowing that man’s foremost love was, by nature, himself, commanded the man to “love” his wife as Christ loved the church (Ephesians 5:25). Additionally, the Lord, knowing that a woman would not naturally desire to submit, commanded the wife to submit to her own husband, as unto the Lord. This does not suggest that she only goes along with her husband so long as she agrees with his decisions, neither does it mean that she can never offer input into the decision-making process. But, in the end, she follows her husband’s leading, trusting the Lord to bless her faithfulness.
The Bible shows us that even heathen kings know it is proper for a woman to honour her husband. Some might suggest that because these words were spoken by a heathen, the reader should discount them, but these truths are supported elsewhere in scripture. For instance, Ephesians 5:33 says that the wife is to reverence her husband. Sara honoured Abraham, even to the point of calling him lord (1 Peter 3:6). Even Abigail, who had a husband that was a man of Belial, honoured her husband when she kept David from ending Nabal’s life (1 Samuel 25:23-33). A woman who honours her husband honours the Lord. She does so because the Lord commands it, not because her husband necessarily deserves her honour.
A normal man naturally desires to protect what God has given to him. Jacob was not always the best example of godliness, but he had the right desire to protect his family from harm. The Bible reveals to us how he reacted when he could see his brother Esau approaching. Unsure of how this reunion might disintegrate into harm, Jacob divided his family with the most precious at the rear. As his family’s protector, Jacob led the caravan. If there was going to be trouble, he would have an opportunity to intervene offering his family an opportunity to flee for safety. According to Ephesians 5:25, a man’s protection should include a willingness to lay down his life for his wife. A godly man will always intercede between his home and the impending danger.
As the head of the home, the man bares the responsibility for the biblical training of every individual within his home. Yet, many homes today have no man in them. Regardless of society’s disintegration, there is never a time when the man ever relinquishes his accountability to God as the spiritual leader of his home. In today’s passage, we read of Abraham bearing his personal responsibility. According to God’s testimony, Abraham bore that responsibility well. The Lord testified that Abraham would command his children and household after him. Abraham’s family would keep the way of the LORD and would do justice and judgment. Unfortunately, the same cannot be expressed for far too many modern Christian homes. In fact, church pews are overflowing with faithful women while their men are absentee husbands expressing little to no interest in the things of God.
As the world seeks to further weaken any distinctions between men and women, it becomes even more important to stand firm upon God’s principles. God has a defined order in the home and the worldly attitudes do not alter God’s precepts. Someone has to be the leader of each home and bear the responsibility. According to 1 Corinthians 11:3, the proper order is a woman submitted to a man, who is submitted to Christ, who is submitted to the heavenly Father. Christ’s submission to the Father in no way suggested inferiority to the Father, nor does a submissive wife indicate any type of inferiority to her husband. In fact, it takes a stronger woman to follow God’s plan of submission. A godly home follows the scripture even when it contradicts the generally accepted teachings of the day.
Why should we forgive others? At first glance, we might think we should do so out of the goodness of our heart. Yet, there must be a deeper and more foundational reason for our forgiveness. Fundamentally, our forgiveness should be centered upon the Lord and His forgiveness toward us. Read Ephesians 4:32 above again. What should motivate our complete forgiveness of others? Is it not because we have been completely forgiven by the Lord? Look closely and you will see that God forgave us “for Christ’s sake.” If God forgave you for the sake of His Son, should this not also be the basis of our forgiveness of others? John confirmed this foundational truth of God’s forgiveness in his first epistle when he said, “. . . your sins are forgiven you for his name’s sake” (1 John 2:12). When we forgive others, we do so “for Christ’s sake.” Forgiving others because you have been forgiven illustrates God's mercy to others.
The study of why men ought to forgive others may seem obvious, but it is actually quite complex without some thorough Bible study. On several occasions, the Lord told His disciples that they needed to forgive in order to be forgiven (Matthew 6:14-15; Matthew 18:34-35; Mark 11:25-26; Luke 6:37). As a result of these statements, many Christians live in fear that they will not receive God’s forgiveness unless and until they have forgiven all those who have wronged them. Two things need to be understood contextually: (1) these commandments from the Gospels were given prior to Christ's sacrificial death upon the cross and (2) He was speaking specifically to His Jewish people. Diligent Bible study always involves asking to whom God is speaking in any particular text. Epistles written specifically to and for the church following Christ's sacrifice reveal that those who are saved are already forgiven on the basis of Christ's payment on the cross. Today, men do not forgive to be forgiven; they should forgive others because they have already been forgiven (Colossians 3:13).
Everyone should and must learn how and when to forgive others. However, forgiveness has some inherent limitations. True forgiveness of sins comes only from Almighty God. People may and should forgive others for things in which they have been wronged, but only God has the capacity to forgive transgressions against Himself and His word. Once an individual has trusted Christ as Saviour, he has been forgiven of all trespasses and the shed blood of Christ serves as the sole basis for that forgiveness (Ephesians 1:7; Colossians 1:14). Though it is important to seek forgiveness from others whom you may have wronged, everyone must still go directly to the Lord to seek the forgiveness for sins. The forgiveness offered by others cancels the conflict amongst and between them; however, the conflict caused by sin between God and man may still remain even after reconciliation has taken place between individuals.
