It is difficult for new and sometimes older Christians to fully comprehend sin's effects. From God’s perspective, every facet of sin involves a vile act. However, from man’s viewpoint, though sin can be extremely harmful, the temporary pleasures (Hebrews 11:25) distract from sin's injurious nature. For instance, Proverbs 6:24 warns about the “evil woman.” We might think this to mean that we should stay away from women who say bad things, yet the evil woman does not always speak negatively. In fact, this woman is said to speak with flattery; she says nice things but with impure motives. This warning is so important that it was given on multiple occasions (Proverbs 2:16; Proverbs 6:24; Proverbs 7:5, 21). The warning here is given specifically about a strange woman (a woman other than the man’s wife), but it applies to men and women alike. We ought to always be on guard about those who flatter us with their words.
Nobody likes to spend time around those who act in a rude or insulting manner. Most people would rather spend people-time with those who focus on saying nice things. However, the truth is that one is just as spiritually dangerous to one's well-being as the other. This is why the Bible warns us to “meddle not with him that flattereth with his lips.” Flattery is directly connected to deceit and covetousness; therefore, God intends for His warning to help Christians avoid people who say nice things deceitfully. These people intend to take advantage of their target. Far too many people have been mistreated and lied to by others whom they thought to be dear friends. It is best to avoid those with flattering lips.
Today's passage proves the Bible truth that our thoughts are not God’s thoughts, neither our ways His ways (Isaiah 55:8-9). God's thoughts are always unimaginably loftier than ours. Unlike God, our thoughts are bound by our limited knowledge. Contrary to the Lord’s, our knowledge is easily corrupted through various influences. This is why scripture reading and preaching often conflicts with our natural thought process. For instance, our natural mind considers rebuke something harmful, negatively affecting the person receiving it. We also naturally consider flattery as something beneficial and uplifting to the recipient. Yet, we have already seen how flattery can be harmful, but have you ever considered the superiority of a rebuke? The Bible says rebuke is better because of what it yields “afterwards.” In the long run, rebuke is far superior to flattery.
Biblical terminology is very important. For example, ignorance of Bible vocabulary has led people to believe that flattery is considerate if it makes others feel good. Yet, the picture presented by scripture is contrary to this line of thinking. Flattery harms both the giver and the recipient. According to scripture, “A lying tongue hateth those that are afflicted by it; and a flattering mouth worketh ruin” (Proverbs 26:28). While we have been led to believe flattery edifies, in reality, it destroys. This truth is confirmed in Proverbs 29:5 where the Bible says, “A man that flattereth his neighbour spreadeth a net for his feet.” Even the flatterer is harmed by his flattery: “He that speaketh flattery to his friends, even the eyes of his children shall fail” (Job 17:5). Without a doubt, flattery harms all those involved.
It has often been said that ignorance is bliss, meaning that to be wise is folly. Nothing can be further from the truth. As with most areas of life, a man must recognize the benefits of integrity before he will truly find its protection of utmost importance. Our passage describes one benefit of integrity when it says that integrity preserves a person. Preservation can refer to several areas like being kept from trouble or kept from death. Both of these would be considered invaluable. Additionally, the Bible says that integrity upholds the believer (Psalm 41:12). This means that the Lord holds men up in the midst of troublous times. Proverbs 11:3 declares another benefit: “The integrity of the upright shall guide them.” Praise God! Integrity guides men in the right way and keeps them from trouble!
Simply for being a man of integrity, Job suffered greatly. No matter what obstacles Job was forced to overcome, he would not relinquish his integrity. In the midst of Satan’s attacks, the Lord commended Job for his integrity when He said that Job “holdeth fast his integrity” (Job 2:3). When Job’s wife verbally joined in the attacks, she pressured him to relinquish his integrity. Job wisely responded to her by saying, “Thou speakest as one of the foolish women speaketh.” Job was not willing to relinquish his integrity. There are things men consider important in life, but few realize the paramount importance of maintaining one’s integrity. The Bible repeatedly stresses the importance of integrity: “Better is the poor that walketh in his integrity, than he that is perverse in his lips, and is a fool” (Proverbs 19:1). This passage illustrates that the most important things in life cannot be purchased with money, nor can they be lost due to the absence of wealth.
As this study has shown, integrity is a matter of the heart, yet it also affects every other aspect of a man’s life. Though men sometimes try to separate an individual’s walk from his true heart’s condition, the Bible reveals the futility of such. Testifying to this truth, the Bible speaks of walking in integrity (Psalm 26:1, 11; Proverbs 19:1; Proverbs 20:7). The Bible says that “by their fruits ye shall know them” (Matthew 7:16, 20) and this principle applies to one’s integrity too. Our passage from Proverbs reveals that as the “just” man walks in his integrity, his children are likewise blessed because of his walk. The secrets of a person’s heart are often unveiled in his walk. Furthermore, a man who walks in his integrity does not fear the judgment of God (Psalm 26:1). Men need integrity of heart, but that integrity must manifest itself in their daily walk.
Men used to be commended for their level of integrity and one's handshake was considered a man’s bond. As societies continue to crumble from the pollution of immorality, men of integrity are quickly disappearing. Unfortunately, churches seem far from immune to this moral decline. What is integrity? In a narrow sense, integrity as used in scripture can be difficult to pinpoint. The word integrity occurs sixteen times in scripture. By considering each occurrence, one can discover clues that provide insight as to its meaning. Integrity is contrasted with the words like perverse (Proverbs 19:1) and perverseness (Proverbs 11:3). Conversely, integrity is used in conjunction with words like upright (Job 2:3; Proverbs 11:3) and uprightness (1 Kings 9:4; Psalm 25:21). In our passage, the word integrity is used alongside the word innocency (Genesis 20:5). These facts would lead the believer to realize that integrity speaks of a moral purity and moral correctness.