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Interestingly, the Lord actually commands His people to be angry! This may surprise or concern some believers who fail to study the entirety of scripture within context, but the Lord admonished believers at Ephesus to be angry. No doubt this was a call for a righteous anger with a cause, but nonetheless it was a call for anger. Why? The Bible points out that a godly anger can put a stop to sin. According to Proverbs 25:23, “The north wind driveth away rain: so doth an angry countenance a backbiting tongue.” This directly correlates to the context of Ephesians 4:26 as the surrounding passages speak of ceasing from sin. Simultaneous to the Lord admonishing believers to be angry, He also cautioned them not to let their righteous anger turn into sin.
In an environment where strife prevails, an angry man thrives. The Bibles points out that this type of person looks for ways to stir up strife. Perhaps he asks questions to get opinions involving others to gauge any dissatisfaction with them. He then turns any small frustration into a larger problem. Perhaps he uses other methods, but the end goal remains the same; he wants to stir up strife. He does this not only in the lives of others, but in his own heart as well. Instead of focusing upon reasons to rejoice in the Lord, he looks for reasons to be frustrated. All the while, he is walking in the flesh and missing out on the fruit of the Spirit: “love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance” (Galatians 5:22-23).
The Bible says, “Wrath is cruel, and anger is outrageous” (Proverbs 27:4). Yet, these two emotions generally adversely affect all who come into contact with them. The believer should not only abstain from ungodly anger within his own heart but also guard himself against making friends with those who are angry. This is why Solomon said, “Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go: Lest thou learn his ways, and get a snare to thy soul.” Generally, believers take on the traits of those with whom they spend the majority of their time. This is why it is imperative that believers spend much time with the Lord and avoid ungodly, close friendships.
Be sure to carefully read today’s verse. A basic definition of discretion refers to someone who seeks out knowledge concerning a conflict and then uses wisdom to arrive at the right decision. On the other hand, ungodly anger unwisely reacts without discretion. It is therefore logical that discretion defers anger. Any individual who thrives on anger often does so by neglecting knowledge and wisdom. He fails to patiently consider every perspective and detail before rushing to judgment fueling his fury. Discretion may delay a reaction, but when one does react using discretion, his reaction will be righteous and helpful for all involved even when his reaction might involve anger.
Anger is often viewed by others as a symbol of strength. From youth, men are taught that one’s strength and authority can be best conveyed through the use of anger. Yet, the Bible teaches that the manifestation of an ungodly anger exhibits a sign of weakness. Anger is a foolish practice (Proverbs 14:17) that resteth in the bosom of fools (Ecclesiastes 7:9). According to Proverbs 16:32, a man “that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city.” This is why the Bible admonishes believers to “be swift to hear, slow to speak,” and “slow to wrath” (James 1:19). This trait is so important that God included it as one of the requirements for those who would desire the office of a bishop (Titus 1:7).
Much of a young person’s character or lack thereof is demonstrated in his behaviour toward adults and especially the elderly. In Isaiah chapter 3, the Bible speaks of a time when the judgment of God will be upon His people, and one of the characteristics of the day will be that “the child shall behave himself proudly against the ancient.” The prophet Elisha dealt with such children when they came out of the city mocking him saying, “Go up, thou bald head; go up, thou bald head” (2 Kings 2:23). Apparently, Job endured a similar problem as he said, “young children despised me; I arose, and they spake against me” (Job 19:18). Children can be cruel, and in doing so they reveal an evil heart displeasing to the Lord. It is never a good idea to encourage children to be insolent and impolite toward adults.
The Bible has much to say concerning the dangers of improper family relationships. “There is a generation that curseth their father, and doth not bless their mother” (Proverbs 30:11). “The son dishonoureth the father, the daughter riseth up against her mother” (Micah 7:6), “the eye . . . mocketh at his father, and despiseth to obey his mother” (Proverbs 30:17). Yet, the first commandment with promise was to “honour thy father and mother” (Ephesians 6:1-2). This honour can be demonstrated by hearkening to (Proverbs 23:22) and obeying one’s parents (Colossians 3:20). As parents seek the Lord’s direction, God will lead them as to how to lead their individual homes (Ezra 8:21). The child’s responsibility is directed toward submitting to and learning of the Lord by obeying the parents.
NOW is the ideal time to love and serve the Lord. Some unwise counsel has suggested that young people should go out and experience the world in their youth before they later settle down and serve God once mature. An equally erroneous teaching proclaims that godly parents should raise their children to love and serve the Master at some future time. Both have misled far too many homes! The Lord wants young people to love and serve Him now. One should begin early in life to learn the most important lessons of life. As a child, one should learn “the fear of the LORD” (Psalm 34:11), to “praise the name of the LORD” (Psalm 148:12-13; Matthew 21:15), and to “remember” his Creator (Ecclesiastes 12:1). Like Samuel, children should grow and be “in favour both with the LORD, and also with men” (1 Samuel 2:26).
The Lord Jesus is the King of kings, the Lord of lords, and the Creator of the universe. Yet, during His earthly ministry, the Lord made it known that He cared for the “little ones” (Matthew 18:6, 10, 14). Perhaps the disciples thought the Master would be too busy or have more important things to do than to take time for the children. The Lord rebuked His disciples for such erroneous thinking. After all, the Lord loved children and wanted them to come to Him. It grieved Him to think that His disciples would forbid any child from coming to Him. Even now, the Lord wants little children to come to Him. No disciple should ever forbid children to come to the Lord. Even with all of life’s distractions, the Bible admonishes young people to remember their Creator in the days of their youth (Ecclesiastes 12:1).
With all the difficult challenges that a woman faces within the home, it should not be surprising that the Lord repeatedly gave warnings against a woman with a contentious spirit. How does the downward spiral begin? She may spend her life serving others with little to no thanks. She may honour and submit to a husband who deserves little honour or authority. If she does not continually walk with the Lord, she can become disillusioned with the Lord and with her duties as a mother and wife. She might begin to be contentious (Proverbs 21:9; Proverbs 25:24; Proverbs 27:15) causing greater problems in the home, perhaps to the point of causing those she loves to become bitter against her (Colossians 3:19).