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Most saved women who have an unsaved spouse would testify that their chief concern lies with seeing their husbands come to know Christ as Saviour. The context of today's passage reveals how an unsaved husband can be won to Christ through his wife's actions. Displaying a meek and quiet spirit is paramount in such efforts. This meekness is to be worn and displayed much like an ornament, and such a spirit is of great price in the sight of God. Most women who are married to unsaved men will admit that their husbands tend to treat them with a lessening degree of devotion as the marriage ages. Regardless, the Bible admonishes wives in this situation to respond in meekness toward their husbands with the goal of winning them to Christ. Today's passage specifically applies to wives with unsaved husbands but also has far reaching application to all believers.
The Bible repeatedly referred to Christ's meekness during His interaction with others. Meekness implies a gentle response toward those who attack. Jesus Christ demonstrated meekness to its perfection on the cross of Calvary when He said, "Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do" (Luke 23:34). Peter emphasized this point when he said of Christ, “Who, when he was reviled, reviled not again; when he suffered, he threatened not; but committed himself to him that judgeth righteously” (1 Peter 2:23). Isaiah prophesied of Christ, “He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth: he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is dumb, so he openeth not his mouth” (Isaiah 53:7). The Bible says that Jesus was mocked, spit on, and struck by His accusers, yet He displayed incomprehensible meekness.
Some people attribute a lack of joy to unfavourable circumstances. They believe joy is attainable only when their circumstances enable them to experience joy. The Bible offers a completely different perspective. Paul testified, “I am exceeding joyful in all our tribulation.” Paul experienced tribulation and yet was exceeding joyful! He also wrote of the churches of Macedonia abounding in joy though they were “in a great trial of affliction” (2 Corinthians 8:2). Furthermore, Paul wrote of the saints of God in Thessalonica that they received the word of God with joy even though they were “in much affliction” (1 Thessalonians 1:6). Lastly, believers should “count it all joy” when falling into divers temptations (James 1:2). We should understand that our joy as Christians is not dependent upon favourable circumstances.
Joy and peace! Any sensible person would readily admit his desire for a life filled with joy. Yet, few people understand the prerequisites for regularly living that way. Previous studies mentioned several of joy’s accompanying virtues, but today’s passage provides one of joy's unifying properties. According to our passage, peace accompanies joy. Proverbs 12:20 also expresses this same relationship: “Deceit is in the heart of them that imagine evil: but to the counsellors of peace is joy.” Those who seek peace will often find joy in this life because peace and joy are entwined. Isaiah 55:12 restates this truth: “For ye shall go out with joy, and be led forth with peace.” It is important to note that men will not “go out with joy” unless they are first “led forth with peace.” Peace and joy are always inseparable. Those who have the peace of God after they are at peace with God through salvation will experience "joy unspeakable" (1 Peter 1:8).
Today's passage teaches several remarkable truths concerning joy. First, joy is given to man by God--but not indiscriminately given to every man. Apparently, joy is given to those who are not sinners in the sense of wallowing in it. Everyone sins, but this verse speaks to the fact that God does not openly bless the sinner who has no desire for God to help him overcome his sinful ways. Moreover, our passage further reveals that God considers it good in His sight for a man to have joy. This point may seem insignificant, but it emphasizes God's true desire for man. Just as God desires for men to have wisdom and knowledge, He wants men to know the joy that comes only from and through Him. Some may think the source of joy disputable, but James 1:17 affirms that “every good gift and every perfect gift is from above.”
The Bible associates several qualities to the truly humble person. The book of James lists a few of these prominent traits as follows. The humble man submits to the will of God (James 4:7). Additionally, he repents of his sins (James 4:8) and mourns over his disobedience (James 4:9). He refuses to speak evil of his brother (James 4:11), but rather chooses to leave judgment to the Lord because He is the righteous Judge (James 4:12). He refuses to boast about what he is doing (James 4:13-16) because he knows that his failure to do right is a sin (James 4:17). Yet, the greatest truth concerning the humble man is not what he does or gives for God, but what God gives to him. The Bible says that God gives grace to the humble and resists the proud (1 Peter 5:5-6). Think about this profound truth. God gives a man what he needs if that man will simply remain humble.
The Bible repeatedly emphasizes that honour follows humility! But how does this work? According to our passage, “whosoever exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted.”  Abased means to be brought low, while exalted means to be elevated. Matthew 23:12 and Luke 18:14 reiterate the truth found in Luke 14:11, yet none of the verses expound upon how this takes place. What or who is at work behind the scenes to make this principle true? The answer is found in James 4:10—“Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and he shall lift you up.” Man’s finite mind-set leads him to think that the way up is up and the way down is down; but according to the Bible, the opposite is true. The way up (to be exalted) is down (through humility) and the way down (to be abased) is up (self-exaltation). Those who seek to be exalted by others will find themselves frustrated through their own efforts; yet those who seek humility will be exalted by God.
Our previous studies have discussed the Bible's built-in dictionary. Interestingly, the discovery of this method of defining words is not new. In fact, men like King James VI (also known as King James I) commented on God's graciousness concerning His word. He pointed out that the definitions of many Bible words could be found by considering surrounding words. John Eadie explains this in his book:  The English Bible, vol. 2, London, Macmillan, 1876, p. 191. Our study in humility is a case in point. The true riches of this word can only be gleaned when one considers some of the words used in close proximity of the word humble (along with its variations). These words include: croucheth (Psalm 10:10), lowly (Proverbs 16:19), boweth down (Isaiah 2:9), bowed down (Isaiah 2:11), brought down (Isaiah 5:15), hewn down (Isaiah 10:33), and abased (Luke 14:11; Luke 18:14). God wants the Bible student to understand the depths and riches of His word and words. In this case, He clearly indicated that humility results from one being brought low.
The Bible has much to say about the tongue or the words man speaks. The tongue of man is a deadly weapon (James 3:5-8). As such, the scripture likens it to a bow that is bent; only the arrows are the expressed lies (Jeremiah 9:3). A similar thought is found in Psalm 64:3 where David said of the wicked that they “whet their tongue like a sword, and bend their bows to shoot their arrows, even bitter words.” Unfortunately, even Christians sometimes make light of how deadly words can be. The old saying, “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me,” may sound quaint; but it is far from the truth. Words do cause wounds. The Bible likens lies to arrows that are shot out of a bow. Relating the lies to the arrows is certainly meant to convey the pain caused by the lying. Lies often do bring hurt; sometimes not physically, but in some form or another lies wound others.
According to the Bible, before a man trusts Christ as Saviour, he remains the enemy of God (Romans 5:10; Colossians 1:21). But God, in His great mercy, saves His enemies as they individually choose to trust in Christ’s payment for their sins. Though a Christian has the indwelling Spirit, he never fully comprehends all that the Lord has done for him through salvation. This is why the Bible says that God’s love passes all knowledge (Ephesians 3:19). However, the more a man draws nigh to God, the more he learns about the kindness God has shown him through Jesus Christ. No matter how we learn in this life, eternity will continue to reveal to the saints the depths of the kindness of God. No wonder the greatness and marvellous nature of His love is truly beyond comprehension.