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Unscriptural authority undermines God’s true authority. Unfortunately, many well-meaning Christians have determined that their own experiences or feelings hijack God’s authority. Authority, however, is only proper when it is within the God-given boundaries established by God’s word. One example is the authority to teach and lead men. According to scripture, this authority is not given to women (1 Timothy 2:12), and when a woman seeks to commandeer this authority, she does so apart from the Lord’s leading. The same holds true when children try to lead the home, or when others seek authority that the Lord never intended for them.
The world justifies an almost unlimited range of reasons for divorce, but the Lord is much more narrow-minded. In fact, the Lord only offered one just cause for divorce in Matthew 19:9. An excellent cross reference (Deuteronomy 24:1) indicates that the fornication mentioned involves an uncleanness found within the woman that took place prior to marriage. If this be true, even adultery fails to qualify as scriptural grounds for divorce. One might argue that the Lord broadened this scope when speaking of the unbelieving spouse leaving the believer, but even there the Lord said to the believing husband, “let him not put her away” (1 Corinthians 7:12) and to the believing wife, “let her not leave him” (1 Corinthians 7:13).
Marriage involves a relationship between a man and a woman, but what constitutes a scriptural marriage? Scripturally speaking, it is not merely “flesh joining flesh.” This is plain in that a man could marry a wife only to find that she had been unfaithful with another man to whom she was not married (Deuteronomy 24:1; Matthew 5:32). It is also clear that Shechem defiled Dinah, but then asked if she could become his wife (Genesis 34:1-4). The woman at the well had an improper relationship with a man, but the Lord declared that that particular man was not her husband (John 4:16-18). Instead, marriage occurs when God joins a man and a woman (Genesis 2:21-24; Mark 10:9), and it is often established by a ceremony with vows given to each other (Matthew 22:1-13; John 2:1-2).
Scripture plainly reveals that God repeatedly calls for His people to separate from the world. This separation extends to every aspect of life, especially including the marriage bond. Why? Because God knows the very real danger that unbelievers pose to believers by drawing them away from Him (Deuteronomy 7:3-4; Judges 3:6-7; 1 Kings 11:2). This is why God specifically instructed His people in both the Old and New Testament to marry among themselves (Jew with Jew and Christian with Christian). The nation of Israel was forbidden to yoke up with the surrounding nations because Israel would adopt heathen practices and the worship of false gods (Exodus 34:15-16). Though God’s commands for the New Testament believer are often different from His plan for the Jew, in this aspect they remain constant and unchangeable.
It is easier to love those with whom we feel a common bond and share a special relationship. In fact, the Lord suggests as much in the scripture. When the Lord encouraged His people to love strangers, He did so by reminding them that they too had been strangers in the land of Egypt. By recalling their past associations, the Israelites would know how to better deal with those who were strangers to them. It would be good for them to recall some of the trials they faced when they were strangers in a strange land. With this in mind, they would know how to care for and minister to the strangers. Though Christians are not under the law and most are not Israelites, much can be learned from these truths. It becomes easier to love those to whom we can closely relate.
The common misconception concerning love is that it simply involves an emotion felt for those for whom we care. Although love is associated with our emotions, love is, in reality, much deeper than an emotion. It is first and foremost a choice that we consciously make. When God commanded His people to love Him, He was not asking them to feel an emotion, but rather, to choose to care for Him. In like manner, when the Lord commanded husbands to love their wives (Ephesians 5:25), He was not asking merely for an emotional attachment, but something much deeper and far greater. In fact, love is something that can be taught and learned. In Titus 2:4, the older women are to teach the younger women to love their husbands and children. Therefore, when God asks us to love, He is asking us to make a choice to love others regardless of our swinging moods or wavering feelings. Love is a choice to make and a decision to do what God has directed His children to do.