Because of the hardness of man’s heart, God permitted man to seek a divorce. The Pharisees, who generally sought to broaden the law’s reach and its application, sought to expand the justification for a divorce. The Lord never condoned this type of perversion of truth but quickly told the Pharisees that God never intended for marriage to have an escape clause when a man grew weary or discontented. God introduced the bill of divorcement because of the hardness of men’s hearts. Even then, the Lord indicated very limited grounds for a biblical divorce. Divorce was never intended to be an option for the masses, and even in those cases where a bill of divorcement was justified or allowed, the Lord still preferred reconciliation between the husband and wife.
Like other callings upon a person’s life, God prepares men and women for marriage. Obviously, God prepares the heart, but He also prepares other areas in order to provide for a strong home. When God created Adam, He could have immediately created Eve, but He chose to allow Adam to experience the sense of being alone. Perhaps there are other reasons, but God may have thought it wise to prepare Adam for marriage. He needed to experience life without Eve. Adam needed to come to the place where he desired companionship. He needed to be alone before he could truly appreciate a wife. In addition to the preparation of Adam’s heart, the Lord gave him a job, a means by which he could provide for Eve (Genesis 2:8-9, 15). All of these preparations were necessary for a strong marriage relationship.
Far too often what is done in the home under the guise of chastening is far from God’s scriptural pattern of discipline. This is nothing new. According to Hebrews 12:10, the Jewish fathers were guilty of chastening their children “after their own pleasure.” Two major problems commonly surface in the discipline implemented in the home: (1) the reason for correction and (2) the motive in correction. According to God’s pattern, parents should never discipline their children because of an annoyance but because of a direct violation of a known law. This is God’s way and should be the consistent practice of godly parents. In addition to this, godly parents should follow God’s pattern and chasten in love for the sake of the child.
God designed and intended for biblical chastening to have righteousness as its intended outcome. Recipients of chastening may find the process grievous, but “afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.” The process may not be at all enjoyable or peaceable, yet the Bible affirms that the outcome is peace. A careful look at the word chasten provides this insight. The root word for chasten is the word chaste. The end goal for those being chastened is that they would become chaste. Chastening is intended to be a purification process that corrects the wrongs for which it was initially implemented. It always leaves the recipient that endures the chastening a stronger and purer person than before the process began.
One who has little understanding of chastening might suggest that God’s chastening is an act born of hatred, but it actually represents an overflowing love from the heart of God. God expresses His motives for chastening His children in Hebrews 12:6 when He says, “For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth.” Again in Revelation 3:19 the Lord says, “As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten.” This again displays a distinction between punishment and chastening. The source of punishment could be construed as anger, justice, or wrath, but the motive of true biblical chastening involves the purest form of love. This means that chastening does not merely benefit the one implementing the chastening, but takes place for the good of the one chastened.
Earthly parents sometimes chasten their children according to their own pleasure, but the Lord chastens His children ONLY for their profiting. In addition, earthly parents will sometimes err by disciplining their children for convenience to end the child’s inconvenience brought upon the parent. The end goal turns out to be the satisfaction of the parent rather than the sole good of the child. However, in God’s dealings with His children, He chastens for the benefit of the one receiving the chastening. He uses His chastening to help make His children partakers of His holiness. When they have done wrong, He wants them to repent (Revelation 3:19). When they have gone astray, He wants them to find correction (Job 5:17). God, as a Father, always chooses to do what is best for His children. It is always exclusively for their profit!
Chastening is not merely a means of judgment implemented by the Lord for wrongdoing, but also serves as a proof of sonship. According to Hebrews 12:6, at some point in every child of God’s life, he will experience the chastening hand of the Lord. Any individual able to freely do wrong without God’s chastening should examine whether or not he is in the faith. The absence of chastening suggests that a person is not a son of God (Hebrews 12:8). Just as any good father will not allow his son to get away with wrongdoing, God the Father does not allow His children to do wrong without suffering the consequences of such actions. Chastisement may be delayed, but it is inevitable.
Chastening is best associated to a parent-child relationship (Deuteronomy 8:5; 2 Samuel 7:14; Proverbs 13:24; Proverbs 19:18; Hebrews 12:6-8). As such, God’s chastening, at least within the New Testament, is only intended for those He calls His sons (1 John 3:2). God chastens His children, not to administer justice, but to strengthen and correct them. The believer does not receive some type of punishment from the Lord resulting from the believer’s sins because these sins have been completely atoned through the shed blood of Christ. However, the saint’s continued practice of sin requires the chastening hand of the Lord in order to conform him into the image of Christ. While chastening is reserved exclusively for sons, a lost man receives only punishment or salvation.
