God tells us in His word that He never intended for a marriage to end in divorce. He desires for one man and one woman to remain together until death parts the two asunder. Divorce would be nonexistent apart from sin (Mark 10:5). Just as God hates sin, He also hates the results of sin. Instead of recognizing God’s true feelings for divorce, men often seek to justify their sinful choices suggesting that God understands and would not want them to remain in an unhappy environment. As sin increases, men’s opinions concerning divorce continue to drift away from God. Years ago, communities, families, and churches frowned upon the act of divorce; however, today divorce has become accepted as the norm rather than the exception. Unfortunately, divorce is not only accepted in the world but readily accepted in the pew and the pulpit.
Marriage is a lifelong invitation to serve the Lord together and strengthen one another in that service. God instituted marriage so that man would not have to be alone. Every groom was to enter into marriage for the purpose of glorifying God with his spouse. The context of Psalm 34 does not directly refer to marriage, but verse 3 provides an amazing invitation that should be presented to every couple entering into the marriage relationship. A young man should ask a young lady to marry him because he believes that they can better magnify the Lord as a couple rather than individually. If the Lord wills, it is an invitation to bear children and train them up in such a way that the next generation would likewise desire to magnify the Lord.
Marriage involves a relationship between a man and a woman, but what constitutes a scriptural marriage? Scripturally speaking, it is not merely “flesh joining flesh.” This is plain in that a man could marry a wife only to find that she had been unfaithful with another man to whom she was not married (Deuteronomy 24:1; Matthew 5:32). It is also clear that Shechem defiled Dinah, but then asked if she could become his wife (Genesis 34:1-4). The woman at the well had an improper relationship with a man, but the Lord declared that that particular man was not her husband (John 4:16-18). Instead, marriage occurs when God joins a man and a woman (Genesis 2:21-24; Mark 10:9), and it is often established by a ceremony with vows given to each other (Matthew 22:1-13; John 2:1-2).
Modern society is increasingly mocking purity, yet God is pleased with those who endeavour to keep themselves pure before marriage. Increasing temptations combined with the declining standards concerning courting have made purity a rarity rather than the norm. Regardless of this trend, young people with a deep and abiding love for the Lord will continually strive to overcome these obstacles and remain pure. Those who have failed in the past will renew their commitment to the Lord seeking to prevent further regrets. This must be accomplished with a firm resolve. A young person must determine that he or she is going to respect the commandments of God and the other individual with whom he or she is courting. Beyond this, each young person must determine to build fences of protection to keep from entering into tempting situations. The Devil does not need much room to rob a youth of his or her purity (Ephesians 4:27).
The godly choice of whom to marry likely will never again be as obvious as it was for Adam and Eve. Yet, the wrong choice can and will usually bring disastrous outcomes along with lifelong consequences. Wise counsel to avoid pitfalls related to bad choices is vitally important! Samson’s choice was ultimately of the Lord, but not because it was wise. His parents knew that his decision was fleshly and attempted to redirect him. Esau rebelliously sought a wife that would never meet his parents’ approval (Genesis 28:6-9). Throughout the Old Testament, parents were involved in the process of choosing the right spouse for their children. It may not be a direct command from God, but it remains a wise principle to follow. Parents are not always right, but the Lord is pleased to use them in this decision-making process.
