It is difficult for new and sometimes older Christians to fully comprehend sin's effects. From God’s perspective, every facet of sin involves a vile act. However, from man’s viewpoint, though sin can be extremely harmful, the temporary pleasures (Hebrews 11:25) distract from sin's injurious nature. For instance, Proverbs 6:24 warns about the “evil woman.” We might think this to mean that we should stay away from women who say bad things, yet the evil woman does not always speak negatively. In fact, this woman is said to speak with flattery; she says nice things but with impure motives. This warning is so important that it was given on multiple occasions (Proverbs 2:16; Proverbs 6:24; Proverbs 7:5, 21). The warning here is given specifically about a strange woman (a woman other than the man’s wife), but it applies to men and women alike. We ought to always be on guard about those who flatter us with their words.
Nobody likes to spend time around those who act in a rude or insulting manner. Most people would rather spend people-time with those who focus on saying nice things. However, the truth is that one is just as spiritually dangerous to one's well-being as the other. This is why the Bible warns us to “meddle not with him that flattereth with his lips.” Flattery is directly connected to deceit and covetousness; therefore, God intends for His warning to help Christians avoid people who say nice things deceitfully. These people intend to take advantage of their target. Far too many people have been mistreated and lied to by others whom they thought to be dear friends. It is best to avoid those with flattering lips.
Today's passage proves the Bible truth that our thoughts are not God’s thoughts, neither our ways His ways (Isaiah 55:8-9). God's thoughts are always unimaginably loftier than ours. Unlike God, our thoughts are bound by our limited knowledge. Contrary to the Lord’s, our knowledge is easily corrupted through various influences. This is why scripture reading and preaching often conflicts with our natural thought process. For instance, our natural mind considers rebuke something harmful, negatively affecting the person receiving it. We also naturally consider flattery as something beneficial and uplifting to the recipient. Yet, we have already seen how flattery can be harmful, but have you ever considered the superiority of a rebuke? The Bible says rebuke is better because of what it yields “afterwards.” In the long run, rebuke is far superior to flattery.
Biblical terminology is very important. For example, ignorance of Bible vocabulary has led people to believe that flattery is considerate if it makes others feel good. Yet, the picture presented by scripture is contrary to this line of thinking. Flattery harms both the giver and the recipient. According to scripture, “A lying tongue hateth those that are afflicted by it; and a flattering mouth worketh ruin” (Proverbs 26:28). While we have been led to believe flattery edifies, in reality, it destroys. This truth is confirmed in Proverbs 29:5 where the Bible says, “A man that flattereth his neighbour spreadeth a net for his feet.” Even the flatterer is harmed by his flattery: “He that speaketh flattery to his friends, even the eyes of his children shall fail” (Job 17:5). Without a doubt, flattery harms all those involved.
Though not all counsel received will be wise counsel, it is still wise to receive counsel. A foolish man neglects to consider the need for counsel. He believes his own understanding sufficient (Proverbs 12:15). A wise man, however, not only seeks counsel, but hearkens to the wisdom found in such. The Bible says that the absence of counsel causes people to fall (Proverbs 11:14) and purposes to be disappointed (Proverbs 15:22; Proverbs 20:18), and that only a fool would go to war without it (Proverbs 24:6). Not only does counsel help to develop godly plans, but also ensures that our motives are pure. Counsel provides safety on a variety of levels (Proverbs 11:14; Proverbs 24:6).
Men who think they need a simplified version of the Bible to assist in understanding misunderstand God's grace found throughout scripture. For instance, the Lord graciously provides associated words to help understand less familiar words. Even if we did not know what the word counsel meant, the Bible provides hints like the one found in Judges 20:7. Judges connects the word counsel with the word advice. Psalms tells us that counsel is gained when people consult together (Psalm 83:3). A counseller is one who can give an answer when asked a question (Isaiah 41:28). Additionally, Proverbs 20:5 points to counsel as a well of deep water that the wise seek to draw out of a man. Anytime we go to someone to seek his advice or input in a matter, we are seeking his counsel. It is important to note that counsel can be wise and righteous, or it can be ungodly. For this reason, the word of God must be the spiritual gauge.
