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When men follow after vanity, they themselves become vain. An individual must make a conscious decision to turn from walking after the Lord to pursue vanity (Jeremiah 2:5). Those who follow after vanity are void of understanding (Proverbs 12:11) and end up in poverty (Proverbs 28:19), sometimes both spiritually and physically. David expressed his concern in this area when he said, “I have not sat with vain persons” (Psalm 26:4). He knew the danger of following vanity and declared that he refused even to sit with vain persons. In Psalm 119:37, the penman pleaded with the Lord for help in turning away his eyes from beholding vanity. God desires and wills for the saints of God to cease from following after vanity.
The book of Ecclesiastes contains documentation of Solomon’s life experiment apart from God. He examined the worth of subjects involving happiness, wealth, labour, and death. Ultimately, he concluded that life “under the sun” (Ecclesiastes 1:14) was vanity. The word vanity means empty or meaningless. Though Solomon wrote extensively concerning vanity, he was not the only person in the Bible to declare the vanity of life. In fact, Solomon’s father David declared that “every man at his best state is altogether vanity” (Psalm 39:5). King David added that if both men of high and low degree were laid in a balance together, they would be “lighter than vanity” (Psalm 62:9). Thus, regardless of worldly accomplishments and accolades, a life void of God remains meaningless.
It is difficult for new and sometimes older Christians to fully comprehend sin's effects. From God’s perspective, every facet of sin involves a vile act. However, from man’s viewpoint, though sin can be extremely harmful, the temporary pleasures (Hebrews 11:25) distract from sin's injurious nature. For instance, Proverbs 6:24 warns about the “evil woman.” We might think this to mean that we should stay away from women who say bad things, yet the evil woman does not always speak negatively. In fact, this woman is said to speak with flattery; she says nice things but with impure motives. This warning is so important that it was given on multiple occasions (Proverbs 2:16; Proverbs 6:24; Proverbs 7:5, 21). The warning here is given specifically about a strange woman (a woman other than the man’s wife), but it applies to men and women alike. We ought to always be on guard about those who flatter us with their words.
Nobody likes to spend time around those who act in a rude or insulting manner. Most people would rather spend people-time with those who focus on saying nice things. However, the truth is that one is just as spiritually dangerous to one's well-being as the other. This is why the Bible warns us to “meddle not with him that flattereth with his lips.” Flattery is directly connected to deceit and covetousness; therefore, God intends for His warning to help Christians avoid people who say nice things deceitfully. These people intend to take advantage of their target. Far too many people have been mistreated and lied to by others whom they thought to be dear friends. It is best to avoid those with flattering lips.
Today's passage proves the Bible truth that our thoughts are not God’s thoughts, neither our ways His ways (Isaiah 55:8-9). God's thoughts are always unimaginably loftier than ours. Unlike God, our thoughts are bound by our limited knowledge. Contrary to the Lord’s, our knowledge is easily corrupted through various influences. This is why scripture reading and preaching often conflicts with our natural thought process. For instance, our natural mind considers rebuke something harmful, negatively affecting the person receiving it. We also naturally consider flattery as something beneficial and uplifting to the recipient. Yet, we have already seen how flattery can be harmful, but have you ever considered the superiority of a rebuke? The Bible says rebuke is better because of what it yields “afterwards.” In the long run, rebuke is far superior to flattery.
Biblical terminology is very important. For example, ignorance of Bible vocabulary has led people to believe that flattery is considerate if it makes others feel good. Yet, the picture presented by scripture is contrary to this line of thinking. Flattery harms both the giver and the recipient. According to scripture, “A lying tongue hateth those that are afflicted by it; and a flattering mouth worketh ruin” (Proverbs 26:28). While we have been led to believe flattery edifies, in reality, it destroys. This truth is confirmed in Proverbs 29:5 where the Bible says, “A man that flattereth his neighbour spreadeth a net for his feet.” Even the flatterer is harmed by his flattery: “He that speaketh flattery to his friends, even the eyes of his children shall fail” (Job 17:5). Without a doubt, flattery harms all those involved.