Scripture plainly reveals that God repeatedly calls for His people to separate from the world. This separation extends to every aspect of life, especially including the marriage bond. Why? Because God knows the very real danger that unbelievers pose to believers by drawing them away from Him (Deuteronomy 7:3-4; Judges 3:6-7; 1 Kings 11:2). This is why God specifically instructed His people in both the Old and New Testament to marry among themselves (Jew with Jew and Christian with Christian). The nation of Israel was forbidden to yoke up with the surrounding nations because Israel would adopt heathen practices and the worship of false gods (Exodus 34:15-16). Though God’s commands for the New Testament believer are often different from His plan for the Jew, in this aspect they remain constant and unchangeable.
For a variety of reasons, people do the things they choose to do. Sometimes their motives are right and godly, and at other times, their motives are simply wrong. The motive should never result from strife or vainglory in the Lord’s service. The Lord Jesus Christ, of course, offers the perfect example of someone whose motives were always pure and holy. People often assumed the worst and said untrue things about Him. He certainly had the right and the wherewithal each and every time to correct their errors. He could have won any and every argument without mercy or grace. Yet, His service was not motivated by selfishness or pride. In fact, the Bible points out that He was equal with God, but made Himself of no reputation (Philippians 2:6-7). He knew He was always right but allowed Himself to be defamed for the greater cause.
Understanding man’s true nature makes today’s verse understandable and comprehensible. Ignoring the true reality of man’s constitution will lead the reader to refuse this Bible truth. Surely no man, woman, boy, or girl would love strife! Strife seems to be contrary to something we would deem lovable. After all, the Bible likens strife to the bars of a castle (Proverbs 18:19), creating a prison for some and an impossible barrier for others. It is birthed through pride (Proverbs 13:10) and harms those most innocent (Exodus 21:22-25). With these thoughts in mind, how could anyone love strife? The answer is quite simple. Man’s flesh desires to rebel against the laws of God. It finds pleasure in transgression and satisfaction in displeasing the Lord. So man, although aware of strife’s downfalls and pitfalls, craves strife and the resultant conflict.
The Lord gave laws to protect innocent life and punish those guilty of harming others. In the midst of these laws, the Bible has a section devoted to a scenario of what might occur when two men strive with each other. During their conflict, they might hurt a woman who was with child causing her to lose her unborn child. The conflict is literal or physical and the problems resulting are literal or physical, but one cannot miss the spiritual truth disclosed. When two people strive, those not even involved in the initial conflict suffer consequences. Before two people decide to take part in strife, they would be wise to consider how their contentious behaviour affects the innocent people around them.
