It seems that far too many men seek to be honoured by others whether deserved or completely unwarranted. However, few men understand the proper biblical path for being rightfully honoured. One would naturally think honour comes to those who are confident and proud, but the Bible reveals the opposite. Proverbs 15:33 and Proverbs 18:12 both declare that humility precedes honour. This means that a person desiring to receive honour must first possess the character trait of true humility. Conversely, the Bible points out that a haughty heart precedes the pathway to destruction (Proverbs 18:12). Moreover, the Bible couples humility with the fear of the Lord and shows that it yields riches, honour, and life (Proverbs 22:4). Desiring these good things is only reasonable, yet they are only derived through God’s prescribed means and not man’s self-styled means.
Our previous studies have discussed the Bible's built-in dictionary. Interestingly, the discovery of this method of defining words is not new. In fact, men like King James VI (also known as King James I) commented on God's graciousness concerning His word. He pointed out that the definitions of many Bible words could be found by considering surrounding words. John Eadie explains this in his book: The English Bible, vol. 2, London, Macmillan, 1876, p. 191. Our study in humility is a case in point. The true riches of this word can only be gleaned when one considers some of the words used in close proximity of the word humble (along with its variations). These words include: croucheth (Psalm 10:10), lowly (Proverbs 16:19), boweth down (Isaiah 2:9), bowed down (Isaiah 2:11), brought down (Isaiah 5:15), hewn down (Isaiah 10:33), and abased (Luke 14:11; Luke 18:14). God wants the Bible student to understand the depths and riches of His word and words. In this case, He clearly indicated that humility results from one being brought low.
The Bible records the fact that Ananias lied to Peter! He told Peter that he and his wife had sold some property for a certain amount of money. Yet, God and His servant knew that he had sold it for more than that indicated to Peter. The Bible teaches that Ananias told these lies to a man but had in fact lied to the Lord (Acts 5:4). Man may not recognize the extent of a lie, but lies told to others are lies told to God. This brings a whole new perspective to the wickedness of lying. Men’s lies are not just before and against men, but they appear before and are in conflict with a holy God. No wonder the apostle Paul said, “Now the things which I write unto you, behold, before God, I lie not” (Galatians 1:20). He understood that lying to men would be lying before God, and he did not want to be guilty of that.
Today's passage provides a list of things that God expressly hates. That list includes those who murder the innocent when it refers to “hands that shed innocent blood” (Proverbs 6:17). It also mentions those whose hearts devise “wicked imaginations” (Proverbs 6:18). In the midst of this list, the Lord twice references lying as it refers to “a lying tongue” (Proverbs 6:17) and “a false witness that speaketh lies” (Proverbs 6:19). This should really concern those prone to lying with seeming impunity. God hates lying so much that He is going to judge those who do it. The scripture says, “he that speaketh lies shall not escape” (Proverbs 19:5), but will "perish”(Proverbs 19:9). In fact, liars are listed among the wicked groups that will “have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone” (Revelation 21:8).
The Bible has much to say about the tongue or the words man speaks. The tongue of man is a deadly weapon (James 3:5-8). As such, the scripture likens it to a bow that is bent; only the arrows are the expressed lies (Jeremiah 9:3). A similar thought is found in Psalm 64:3 where David said of the wicked that they “whet their tongue like a sword, and bend their bows to shoot their arrows, even bitter words.” Unfortunately, even Christians sometimes make light of how deadly words can be. The old saying, “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me,” may sound quaint; but it is far from the truth. Words do cause wounds. The Bible likens lies to arrows that are shot out of a bow. Relating the lies to the arrows is certainly meant to convey the pain caused by the lying. Lies often do bring hurt; sometimes not physically, but in some form or another lies wound others.
Proverbs 31 reveals the attributes of a virtuous woman (Proverbs 31:10). Though a virtuous woman possesses many wonderful traits, perhaps her greatest strength lies in the manner in which she speaks—with wisdom. This God-given wisdom enables her to refrain her lips from foolishness, instead choosing to edify others with her speech. Many people offer others advice and even wisdom, but this woman is said to speak with the “law of kindness” in her tongue. Not only does she speak wisely, but she presents this wisdom with the right spirit--the spirit of kindness. Apparently, when she speaks wisely, her words encourage others to listen and heed what she says. Her hearers want to receive her words and put them into practice. Why? Because she presents her words with this “law of kindness” much like those today who are “speaking the truth in love” (Ephesians 4:15).
Most sincere people, seeking opportunities to show kindness toward others, will generally have more opportunities than means. In fact, some instances will arise when helping others remains practically impossible. This is especially true when a financial need arises beyond the person's capacity to help. Does this mean kindness does not exist or that the individual lacks genuineness? No! Today's passage teaches a profound principle, “the desire of a man is his kindness.” Kindness is exemplified where there is a present desire to be kind toward others even though the individual may be without means to fulfil his desire to help. The passage ends by stating that “a poor man is better than a liar.” A man who desires to help but cannot do so is better than those who lie or deceive others about their true heart's intent to show kindness. Thankfully, God does not simply look at the outward act but can always see the heart's true desire, purpose, and motive!
Far too many of today's pundits sanction giving others whatever they want in an attempt to display true love. Parents have become increasingly trapped in this dilemma being convinced that they fail their children unless they give them every new gadget. The husbands thought to love the most are the ones who shower their wives with the most, the best, and do so frequently. The average person may find these scenarios reasonable, but they remain completely contrary to the word of God. In fact, the Bible expresses just the opposite. Today's passage reveals that a righteous man could actually smite someone with his words in kindness. A righteous man will always offer a rebuke (or correction) to those heading in the wrong direction. The intention of such a rebuke is to set the person back on the right track; true biblical kindness at work. Proverbs extols the virtues of those wounds gained when offered in the spirit of kindness and friendship (Proverbs 27:6). Kindness is never demonstrated by simply telling others what they want to hear but often confirmed through open rebuke (Proverbs 27:5).
Many people have so-called friends, but oftentimes these friendships are built upon weak support structures. Yet, testing the true depths of one's friendships can be quite challenging. The previous lesson pointed to the ease of making friends by showing yourself friendly. Yet, too many people focus on using material means to gain friendships. Money can buy friends but there remains that doubt concerning the true foundation of those relationships. The Bible teaches that “wealth maketh many friends” (Proverbs 19:4). This truth is further emphasized in Proverbs 14:20 where the Bible says, “the rich hath many friends.” This fact remains ever more prevalent as the days go on. Those who are rich will have many “friends,” while those who are poor have far fewer close associations. Unfortunately, “Every man is a friend to him that giveth gifts” (Proverbs 19:6). As long as there is money or gifts to be given, people will have “friends”; but as soon as the money runs out, the “friends” will be gone too. True friendships, however, may be gained by showing yourself friendly and will be cultivated through righteousness.
Very few people understand the simplicity involved in cultivating true friendships. In fact, far too many people emphasize the wrong factors when considering how to make friends. They look at one's appearance or charisma and attribute it as the key to making friends. Yet, the Bible points out a simple process as the key for gaining true friends. The one who makes friends simply must first “shew himself friendly.” Unapproachable people remain lonely and tend to miss out on much of what life has to offer. Those who struggle making friends should examine themselves to see whether or not they truly display themselves as friendly or more standoffish. People generally refuse to put forth the extra effort to get to know those who come across unwelcoming. People want to make friends with those who are approachable and there is no better way to make yourself approachable than to show yourself friendly. If a man does not appear to be friendly, others will pass him in their quest to cultivate lasting relationships.
